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Making a Change

Admission is the first step. By being truthful and admitting you are displaying bullying behaviour and understanding your behaviour is wrong, you’ve taken the first step to making that change. You’ll feel much better if you deal with your issues rather than taking it out on someone else and you will ultimately be a much nicer person to be around.

The next part is a bit harder but it’s not impossible – Talk to someone and ask for help. Parents? Teacher? School Counsellor? Friend? School Mentor? E-mail us? Talking about what you are doing may help you understand why you are doing it and help you to stop. If you are willing to do this, you will deserve every bit of support and encouragement you can get.

If your bullying behaviour has become a habit, it may not be easy to just stop. Be patient and keep telling yourself you are doing the right thing and it will make a huge positive difference to your life and to the lives of those you bully.

Think about:

  • What you did
  • Why your behaviour was wrong
  • Who you hurt – how it made them feel
  • What you were trying to accomplish by bullying them
  • How you will accomplish the same thing without hurting anyone

Ways to change your behaviour:

  • Talk to someone and tell them how you feel
  • Apologise to the person you have been bullying
  • Stop hanging around with other bullies
  • Make new friends – form positive relationships with people
  • Set yourself some goals, such as:
    • I will be a friendly person today
    • I won’t be nasty to anyone today
    • I won’t hurt anyone today
  • Talk to your friends and ask them to help you stop
  • Find some positive ways to help you deal with your feelings and emotions. Don’t take your hurt out on someone else
  • Find ways to boost your own self-esteem
  • Try some volunteering (https://bulliesout.com/get-involved/young-ambassadors/)

Think about how you approach people and the language you use. Sometimes people can use aggressive or hostile language without realising it.

Saying ‘Move it’ or ‘What’s your problem?’ could sound hostile. But saying ‘Excuse me, I need to get past’ or ‘Is there something wrong?’ sounds assertive without intimidating or scaring someone.

Don’t become a statistic or newspaper headline for the wrong reason! You are in control of who you want to be. Don’t give up – You Can Change!

 

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Need to talk?

If you are being bullied or are concerned about someone who is, you can receive help and support from one of our trained Mentors. We currently do not have the ability to provide support face to face or via the telephone and can only provide an e-mentoring service to those affected by bullying..

If you would like a Mentor to email you, please contact: mentorsonline@bulliesout.com

If you would rather speak to someone over the telephone, you can call Childline on: 0800 1111

For any community-related issues, such as anti-social behaviour, we would suggest contacting your landlord, the local police or your local environmental health department (where applicable), as we are unable to deal with these types of complaints.